15 Well Mannered Insults To Use Against Your Enemy
Wednesday, Aug 19, 2020, 6:31 pm
By:James Fraser
Is swearing bad? Some people say yes, and some say no. Many of those who think swearing is fine would absolutely hate it when someone starts cursing them back. What we are about to show you now are some well mannered insults, which work much better than swear words when you have to insult someone.
1.Oh no, We Love Chocolate Chip Cookies
May the chocolate chips in your cookies always turn out to be raisins.
Some people hate raisins. They think raisins unnecessarily or inappropriately appear in many of the foods they love. One of the many reasons why people hate raisins is that they look like chocolate chips. If you are a chocolate cookie lover, and if someone uses this insult on you, you are going to get mad for sure.
2.This Painful Insult
"May you always get up from your computer with your headphones still attached."
This is yet another frustrating situation we keep experiencing frequently. Earphones/headphones have become a part of our lives that sometimes we even forget the fact that we are wearing them. Sometimes, we either hurt our ears or damage our gadgets in the process.
3.This Horrible Insult
May your chair produce a sound similar to a fart, but only once, such that you cannot reproduce it to prove that it was just the chair.
Sometimes chairs or other furniture we sit on make noise in such a way that everyone around us think we have just farted. No matter how hard you try, you are not going to produce the same sound again! It can be very embarrassing.
4.Great Insult to Use Against Your Alcoholic Friend
May your five year old neighbor have their violin lessons during all of your hangovers.
Hangover is a terrible condition. There are about twenty different types of hangover symptoms ranging from headache to anxiety and depression. Noises or disturbances make the condition terrible. People who frequently face hangovers know the pain of this insult.
5.Another Disastrous Situation
May you have your laptop charge all night without noticing the cord isn't plugged in the wall.
We all can relate and understand how depressing this situation can be. Be it laptop or our phone, sometimes we just forget to check whether the gadget is charging or not. Result? We miss out on something very important the next day.
6.That Just Doesn't Feel Good
May you always step in a wet spot after putting on fresh socks.
When you step on a wet spot after putting socks, that awkward and uncomfortable feeling will haunt you until the socks dry up. It just doesn't feel good, and the feeling is bit too complicated to express! You got to feel that.
7.This Happens to Most of Us As Well
May your tea be too hot when you receive it, and too cold by the time you remember it's there.
We keep forgetting things. Forgetting things was considered as a mental disorder in the olden days. Unfortunately, these days it has become acceptable. Our technology-induced and fast-paced lives make us forget many things.
Loading...
8.This is Funny But True
May your cookie always be slightly too large to fit inside your glass of milk.
Oh, not always! At one point of life, we also face the same situation where cookies in our hand don't fit in milk glass. Breaking cookie into pieces is a mess. Well, everyone hates that situation, including Obama!
9.This Insult on an Unfortunate Situation
May the pin of the bathroom stall never reach the lock to close the door.
At times, some of us face this problem. You either have to switch to another stall, or simply get your work done if you have no time or interest whatsoever in hand to do that. Now, imagine someone facing this situation, who is already hit by diarrhea.
Loading...
10.Yet Another Hilarious Insult
May you never be quite certain whether that pressure is a fart or poop.
Failing to judge between a fart and poop results in an instant regret! This is yet another funny insult to use on people who don't stop annoying you. Next time when you have to use a swear word, use this well mannered insults instead!
11.We All Hate This, Right?
May your spoon always slip and sink under the hot soup you eat.
We all hate this feeling of having to pick up sunken spoon in a soup bowl with bare hands. That simply doesn't feel good. The pain is so strong with people who are germophobic. Use this funny curse on annoying people or friends. This insult sounds dramatic!
12.Internet Surfers' Problems
May your article load that extra little bit as you're about to click a link so you click an ad instead.
There are millions of websites out there on the internet, but not all of them are great when comes to user interface. However, many factors influence smooth browsing experience including your internet speed and browser type/version. Sometimes we end up clicking ads while we try to click on a link or title.
13.This Insult That Hurts Pillow Flippers
May both sides of your pillow be warm.
Are you a pillow flipper? If you keep flipping your bed pillow for the cooler side, you can very well relate to this funny incident. And yes, this can be frustrating.
14.This Happens to Most of Us, If Not All
May your mother come to talk to you, and then leave your door slightly ajar, so that you have to get up and close it.
How many times you got angry on your mom for not closing your room door completely while she leaves your room? This is a global problem! How do you solve it? Forget it; you can't solve that anyway. God bless moms though, without whom nobody is going to deliver food to your room every now and then.
15.Finally, This Hilarious Insult
May you never remember these curses when you need them to use.
Do you like these well mannered insults? We liked them too! And, we can't wait for any more time to use these funny insults. So, let us throw this last insult on you. You are not going to remember any of these insults when you badly need them against someone.
Report
Loading...
