15 People Reveal Their Best Drunk Story
Tuesday, Aug 25, 2020, 4:26 pm
By:James Fraser
Sometimes, parties go out of control. The last house party I was in, I saw a drunk dude put a firecracker in his butt crack and ask his friend to light it up. Unsurprisingly, the other inebriated guy obliged the request! BAMM! The explosion caused a nearby standing man to twitch and drop his wineglass. Not knowing what was happening around, a stoned guy ran out of the room stepping on the sharp pieces of glass, thinking an officer might have raided the house. We had to rush at least two guys to the nearby hospital, and well, I have never been to a house party ever again! Read 15 such funny, bizarre, and crazy drunk stories, as shared by people.
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1.This Disgusting Poopy Mess at a House Party
20 years old, let friends stay at house after a party, continue drinking into the night.. go to bed. Wake up next day, go into living room where I had three friends sleeping. Poop everywhere...
poop...
flip my shit.
Friend crawling on floor grabs my leg "who shit on me?"
He's covered in shit. In shit-stained underwear. His pants across the room on the floor, poop larger than I've ever seen in them, and a smear trail leading away.
He denies it even today.
He was a big guy, and the amount of poop was devastating. I had to replace furniture.
- Noterayinge34
2.Exactly the Kind of Things You Do When You are Drunk
This happened while my friend was incredibly drunk. As we left the ballroom at a formal dance we were in, we went into an elevator with two cops in it. My friend proceeds to wave to them, turns around (now facing the elevator door) and proceeds to unzip his pants and pee on the elevator door. He was arrested and spent 17 hours in jail where he claimed to have met a pimp named "Vanillie V." He still has the pimp's number.
- Gregarious7
3.Too Much Food and Drink Don't Go Well Together
After a lovely Italian banquet, dressed semi-formally, my best friend, her brother and his girlfriend and I decide to continue drinking at our local watering hole. My friend ate tripe and God only knows what else and upon arrival at the bar, announces that she needs to GO. Except it's like a fucking high school reunion in there and she refuses to poop in a small two stall extremely crowded bathroom. So we head back outside, and she finds an alley and proceeds to liquid shit a mere 20 feet from the bar with me on watch out. Alls better and she's finishing up when a gust of hot wind comes from behind her and takes the stank of poo directly into my face. I immediately vomited. We both don't like to talk about it.
- rock_island
4.When an Ex Got Drunk and Made a Mess!
My ex GF once showed up at 2 in the morning unannounced after we had been broken up for two weeks. She is hammered drunk, so I just put her to bed because I had to work in the morning and didn't even wanna deal with her. About an hour later I wake up, and she is squatting down on my floor taking a piss. I turn the light on and I'm like "wtf are you doing?". She pulls her pants up pushes me away and calls me some other dudes name. She's grabbing her stuff to leave, and I'm pretty pissed at this point so just let her leave super drunk. I clean up the piss and go back to bed. About an hour later someone if pounding on my door again. I open it and its her shes like"hey what are you doing". I'm like you just pissed on my floor and left! She responds with "pfff I wasn't even here."
- A_Love_Stain
5.When One of the Friends Went Missing
A big group of my friends went out one night after some pretty serious pregaming. They get to a bar, drink some more; everyone's really wasted and a couple of hours pass. Eventually, the group reconvenes and decides to call it a night. At this point, they realize one person, lets call him K, is missing. But they just assume he's found his way home and leave.
The next morning, K is nowhere to be found. It isn't until 24 hours later that they finally found out what happened. K got so drunk he went running naked through the city until the police finally arrested him. He blew a BAC of .288
- Psohl14
6.When You Watch UFC While You are Drunk
The first time I mixed tequila and whiskey, me and my drinking mate (who is 6" taller and has 100lbs on me) start wrestling. I think we were watching UFC or something. Anyways, he gets me in a bad guillotine choke. It was bad because he had my jaw in there. Afterwards, I had a case of TMJ (couldn't open my mouth much) that lasted for a couple of months. Afterwards, my jaw clicked any time I opened it. Fast forward a few years, and there we are mixing tequila and whiskey again. I asked him to punch me in the face, and he obliged. He knocked me the fuck out. However, he fixed my jaw. It doesn't bug me at all anymore.
- safeNsane
7.Being the Odd Guy or Third Wheel Has Its Own Advantages
My Freshman year of college me and my small group of friends went to my boyfriends family's cabin for a weekend of drinking. The first night there we all got pretty shitty and somehow the night ended in me and the other girl in the group having a competition to see who can get their boyfriend to stay hard longest. Then it turned into a blowjob race. And then it ended in the two couples of the group having sex with their partner, with the odd guy out just jerkin' it. All of this was going on in the same room. Everybody swore to not speak of it after that night.
- -Its_just_me-
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8.Reason They Say Alcohol Gives You Wings
My cousin took me and two other friends out to celebrate the New Year. One of the friends, Amy, had not eaten before drinking and demanded McDonald's. As we were pulling in the near empty parking lot at the hour only people like us are out, her favorite song came on. She opened the door of the moving vehicle, jumped out, and landed on her feet. Then began to shake it like a salt shaker across the parking lot.
- dreamofnodreams
9.So Many Twists and Turns!
After a crazy night of heavy drinking, me and my friend decided to crash at his house, everyone was asleep except his sister, we slowly got inside the house and went to his room to sleep. I woke up to some noise of something falling. Opened my eyes to see his sister blowing me, She immediately put an hand on my mouth and told me not to tell anyone, I said sure, and she continued. We dated for an year before we broke up.
- Smunny
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10.And This Terrible Mess up
Five of us spent the weekend in Juarez a while back (before it was so murdery). One dude drank nothing but tequila and spent the whole night chatting up a girl he was convinced was the hottest thing he had ever seen. We spent the whole night trying to convince him she was a dude. One blowjob in an alley later, she flops out her cock for reciprocation. He actually threw up on him/her and ran out to us yelling "Fuck fuck fuck!!" We laughed and laughed. And laughed. Then laughed some more.
If we ever try to tell that story around him, he will take his ball and go home, immediately.
- witless_banality
11.This Pizza Emergency!!!
My friend dropped her slice of pizza and yelled "OH NO, PIZZA EMERGENCY!!!" She freaked out for like 5 minutes
And then they gave her a replacement slice to shut her up and shooed us out of the store.
She will not let me tell this story in her presence.
- BlueBayou
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12.Reason Why You Should Hang out With Bros!
Went to a house party in high school with a couple of buddies, let's call them John and Marcus. After a couple of hours, Marcus was fairly drunk and talking up a rather unattractive young lady. A few minutes later they headed upstairs together. About five minutes passed and John, who was also rather intoxicated, stood up and went after them. From where I was sitting, I could see up the stairs, and I watch as John proceeds to kick open the locked bedroom door and scream "You'll thank me for this tomorrow." A moment later he comes out with Marcus over his shoulder and stormed out of the front door. I drove them both home. Marcus thanked John the next day.
- harri242
13.This Very Awkward Moment
She fell asleep on a toilet while she was at a friend's house, somehow got home, got naked, and got into bed. Unfortunately, she got into her mom's bed instead of her own.
- amberbramber
14.Things That Happen At Backstage
At a frat party during my freshman year of college, two friends and I went to the bathroom together drunkenly, as girls usually do. Anyway, as I'm leaning on the lockless door to keep it closed, one of my friends is peeing, while the other opens the medicine cabinet and starts digging around. Then she pulls out a razor and walks over to the bathtub, (which is filled with ice, housing the extra keg), sits on the keg and proceeds to shave her vagina, announcing that she is going to fuck the president of the frat... To anyone wondering, she did. And some poor (or lucky, if you look at it that way) boy had lady pubes in his razor. Also sorry to anyone doing a kegstand that night.
- iaskedalice
15.And This Cum Slap!
First week of college my buddy was having drunk sex with this random freshman girl he met at a party and ended up finishing on her stomach (pretty standard procedure IMO). I guess she's never had a guy do that before so she wiped the semen off her chest and stomach with her hand and slapped my friend across the face with his own jizz and told him to leave. He only told me and a couple of our friends and told us to never speak about it again because a week after he met the girl he's been dating ever since. Oh yeah NSFW by the way.
- DeltaTauReddit
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